Thursday, December 30, 2010


So after several travel fiascos and cracking my tooth in half, I finally made it to Florida Monday morning - only 2 days late.

It has been pretty cold so far. I walked around on the beach yesterday a little bit, but mostly my outdoor activities have included shopping and going to the hot tub. I do wish that it was warmer, but after hearing that it is snowing in Denver, I am a little more okay with the coldness.

Today my uncle, cousin, dad, brother, and myself are going kayaking. I have never been before and I am SUPER excited to go!!!

Sorry for the short update, but I have to go shower! Hope you are all having wonderful holiday seasons!

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Big, Fun, Scary Adventures 2011

Some of you might know that I spent November writing a novel for National Novel Writing Month. After the month is over, the staff blog about their Big, Fun, Scary Adventures that they will take on in the next year - and invite everyone to come up with their own lists and comment with it. I did not comment, but I think the idea is a great one, and I want to make a list.

So here are my plans for Big, Fun, Scary Adventures in 2011:

  • Lose weight. Do not try to tell me that this is not BIG, FUN, or SCARY. It is all three, and all of you know it.
  • Complete a triathlon with Janel's triathlon group. This is so scary to me. I do not swim well. (I can get in a pool and not drown doing laps, but I have zero form.) I do not bike at all. But Janel is so persuasive, and I met some of the girls who did it last summer and they just loved it. I am already saving for the program, and I will be working out with them from April or May through the race in August. I will not do my regular training during that time - I'll only be running, swimming, and biking.
  • Complete a marathon. I talked to Janel about this - with the Tri in early August, she is confident that I can be ready for a late fall marathon. Provided that I will not be breaking my toe again this summer.
  • Finish my fairy tale manuscript. I've been working on it off and on for two years now. I need to finish it.
  • I feel like this list should have 5 things. Okay - last item - if my choir is singing a piece of music that I love and it has a soprano solo - AUDITION for it. I chickened out this fall, and I wish I hadn't. The girl who got it was okay, but it was far better suited to my voice type.
There's my list! I'm excited.

What are YOUR Big, Fun, Scary Adventures for 2011 going to be? Reply with them here, or make a blog post, and put a link in the comments! I would love to hear what you will tackle in the coming year.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Ouch, life. Ouch.

Today had a few good spots, but for the most part, it went wrong almost right from the beginning.

Waking up was not so bad. I had an appointment at 9:30, so I got to lay around for an extra 20 minutes, which was nice. Got up and went upstairs to take my shower. I wasn't in the shower for 30 seconds when the whole right side of my back seized up, and continued to spasm for the whole shower, and periodically throughout the day. Not. Fun. It makes driving especially hard, because the slightest twisting to look out side windows caused it to spasm again.

Then, I followed the Google directions to the Dr.'s office I was going to. They got me... in the complete opposite direction than I wanted to go. Called the office, got turned around, stopped to turn on my GPS, and finally got there, at least 20 minutes late for my appointment. They were extremely nice about it, though and still got me in right away.

Okay, this part of the story is good - finally! A few months ago I signed up for Groupon. (Which, side note, is AWESOME.) If you don't know what that is, it's a daily deal thing that is tailored to your city. So about a week after I signed up, there was a Groupon for laser hair removal. I have always wanted this done on my upper lip. I have dark hair, very annoying, and I hate taking care of it. After scouring the internet for info on the office and the doctors, I found nothing but rave reviews. So I went ahead and bought the Groupon - $150 for 6 sessions. Which is something like 90% off. Anyway, my first session was today. Not only did I get my upper lip done, but chins were also part of the package! I have a rogue hair or two on my chin, so I was excited about that too.

Laser hair removal is quite the cool thing, let me tell you. The actual process took all of three minutes. She did my chin first, and I didn't feel anything the first 5 or 6 pulses. When she got to my one rogue hair that was there it hurt a little, but no biggie. Felt like a tiny pinprick. Then she did my upper lip. These ones I definitely felt! I could also see the laser (from behind my protective glasses of course), and I felt very futuristic, or like there was a tiny spaceship warring on my hair. Haha. Truthfully, the actual laser did not really bother me at all. The weirdest part was being able to smell my hair burning! Afterwards, my skin was red and a little swollen, similar to how it would be after waxing, but a little more painful. I iced it on and off all day and it already looks almost back to normal. I have 5 more sessions between now and June, and I'm pumped to see the end result.

Back to the rest of the day.

This afternoon was our monthly board meeting. Not bad, but just a general stressor for me. I don't particularly enjoy taking minutes. As soon as the meeting was over, my boss decided that she wanted to stay for the trustee's meeting which directly follows ours, and told me that I needed to go pick up her daughter from school, get her dinner, and bring her back to the library.


I did not like that. My boss did give me money for it, and I do know her daughter pretty well by now. But still. It's the principle of the thing. If you want to stay for a meeting, plan for it in advance and get childcare ahead of time. It just irked me to no end.

Then I went and worked out. It was hard, because of my stupid spasming back and we had to modify a handful of exercises so that I didn't die.

And the whole day I just wanted go home, lay down, and cry. Thanks, PMS.

Now I am at home, watching Castle, with my microwave warmy thing on my back. I am so glad today is over. Tomorrow will be much better, especially since it will end with my choir concert at Zoolights, that most of my Denver friends will be at. YAY FRIDAY!

Monday, December 6, 2010

My Old Self vs. My New Self

Yesterday was sooooo not good. I don't know where it came from, but I binged big time yesterday for the first time in a long time. I will not list all the things I ate, because if I read someone else's list, that would be a HUGE trigger for me. So suffice it to say, I ate a lot. I ate until I was uncomfortable, and THAT sucked. I just could not stop. I even made a special trip to the store. It has been MONTHS since I've done that. I still haven't figured out what was going on with me!!

I have been consistently on my meds for over a month now, which is awesome. They are a huge help in me not bingeing on a regular basis. Which makes yesterday even more strange.

I felt so incredibly sick and guilty last night.

This morning I woke up and thought about yesterday. It sucked. I did not like it.

So I climbed back up on the wagon and dusted myself off. I ate within my calories all day today, and after work, I hit the gym for a sweaty 40 minutes on the elliptical. And believe it or not, I LOVED that time working out. My body felt spectacular both during and after my workout. I cannot tell you how much better today made me feel.

I was not myself yesterday. I was my old self, and that person doesn't surface very often anymore.

While I know who I was before played a huge part in who I am today, we are no longer the same. I will acknowledge that part of myself, and I will be grateful for the experiences I had and the things I learned during that time... but I'm not going to let it run the show. Not anymore.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Mini Quiches

-8 ounces turkey breakfast sausage, removed from casing and crumbled into small pieces
-1 teaspoon extra-virgin olive oil
-8 ounces mushrooms, sliced
-1/4 cup sliced scallions
-1/4 cup shredded Swiss cheese
-1 teaspoon freshly ground pepper
-5 eggs
-3 egg whites
-1 cup 1% milk

Position rack in center of oven; preheat to 325°F. Coat a nonstick muffin tin generously with cooking spray.

Heat a large nonstick skillet over medium-high heat. Add sausage and cook until golden brown, 6 to 8 minutes. Transfer to a bowl to cool. Add oil to the pan. Add mushrooms and cook, stirring often, until golden brown, 5 to 7 minutes. Transfer mushrooms to the bowl with the sausage. Let cool for 5 minutes. Stir in scallions, cheese and pepper.

Whisk eggs, egg whites and milk in a medium bowl. Divide the egg mixture evenly among the prepared muffin cups. Sprinkle a heaping tablespoon of the sausage mixture into each cup.
Bake until the tops are just beginning to brown, 25 minutes. Let cool on a wire rack for 5 minutes. Place a rack on top of the pan, flip it over and turn the quiches out onto the rack. Turn upright and let cool completely.

Here is the link for the original recipe, posted above. Made as the recipe suggests, they are 90 calories per quiche.


Now that that is out of the way, here is what I did differently!

1. I only used 1/2 cup milk instead of 1 cup. They turned out perfectly, not dry at all. I really would go with 1/2 cup milk.

2. I HATE mushrooms. I used green peppers instead, and left out the green onions as well.

3. I used mozzerella cheese instead of swiss, because that is what I had in the house.

4. I threw in a teaspoon of onion powder. Because I felt like it. Ha.

With my changes to the recipe, my quiches are 82 calories each. You can do so much with this recipe - use different kinds of meat, cheese, or veggies to suit your tastes. Just make sure to calculate your calories with your substitutions!

Also, make sure you do what they say, and use a NON-STICK muffin pan that is sprayed really well. I put most of mine in the freezer and just get one out and microwave it in the morning. It takes about a minute (today I did 35 seconds, flipped it over, and did another 25). I have been toasting english muffins and sandwiching a quiche in the middle for a quick breakfast sandwhich. Today I also spread a wedge of Laughing Cow Light French Onion flavor on the muffin as well. Holy cow, it was the most delicious breakfast sandwich of my life!!!

Are these something you would make? What would you put in them?

Wednesday, November 17, 2010


I think one thing that has helped me get back on track is planning. I plan breakfast the night before usually (I am not a morning person, so if I don't plan it I will just eat anything), and then I put together lunch and snacks for the day. As soon as I get to work in the morning I log on to MFP and log all my food except for dinner. Dinner is usually less planned, but I am more in control at night and will choose good things for the most part.

I am not a huge fan of cooking, and I do eat a lot of frozen meals. I have recently discovered the new Lean Cuisine Steamer Bags. They are really tasty. I am not being paid to say this, they have no idea. But wow... they just do not taste like your normal frozen entree. YUM YUM!

As long as I am telling you about newly discovered foods, Lucerne (is this only a Safeway brand?) has limited edition yogurts out that taste like gingerbread, caramal apple, and pumpkin pie. Also delicious.

Lastly, don't let me forget to post the recipe my mom emailed to me for mini quiches. They are awesome, and I have been sandwiching them in an english muffin for a super quick breakfast sandwich. I will post it tonight or tomorrow!

So are you a planner? Or do you just go with the flow?

Tuesday, November 16, 2010


Whenever we were about to attempt some difficult music for the first time, our choir director in college would always say to us, "Courage!"

It is hard for me to blog these days. I am very much struggling and it is hard to admit. I called my mom to talk a few Thanksgiving details the other day and ended up on the phone with her for an hour, crying, because I have gained back so much of what I lost. Being a mom though, she had lots of great suggestions, including going back on HBC. I would rather live life without any meds, but going on and off my depression meds all the time has shown me that it is a bad idea for me. She pointed out too, that the same month I stopped taking my HBC was the month I stopped losing weight. Interesting. So I'm trying it again. Perhaps I am one of the few people that actually lose weight on HBC, hahaha.

I don't want to jinx anything, but yesterday I had a great day. I was spot on with my calories, and hardly even thought about binging. I am hoping for a similar day today, and I have Janel after work, which I'm really looking forward to.

I am keeping busy and I am really loving all my activities. I work out with Janel two nights a week, go to church on Wednesday evenings, and I have choir rehearsal on Sundays. I am slowly but surely making friends doing all of these things (yes, including at the gym, haha!!!). This month is National Novel Writing Month, and I am doing that as well. I hit 25,000 words yesterday, so I'm right on track!

And in new/surprising/exciting/weird news, I have been doing some dating this month as well. I got in contact with a guy I sort of dated last spring at the beginning of the month because he is doing NaNoWriMo too. We have gotten together a handful of times since then, but always to write. So not real dates. We keep saying we should do something instead of writing, but if we do, it likely won't happen until December, when this madness is over. Even so, it is fun not to have to write alone.

Now, here is the weird part... I do not do a lot of dating. I have been on Match for 5 and a half months now, and just last night actually met up with someone from there in person for the first time. (I am very selective in who I contact and who I will talk to on dating sites. I flat out pass on probably close to 95% of the guys on there. I really only contact people who state outright that their faith and a relationship with God is the most important thing to them.) Anyway... it was really fun last night. It was a relaxed, "hey let's grab a coffee, but not call this a date" get to know you kind of thing. We sat at Starbucks and talked for 2 hours.

I have hardly ever had *one* guy interested in dating me... and now I have 2? CRAZY! It is still super casual on both fronts though, and the minute I start to feel more (if I start to feel more) towards one guy, then I know I will have to talk to the other. But for the next week or two, I guess I will just see how it all plays out. Maybe I won't end up seriously dating either of them... leaving this all in God's hands at this point, because my experience is pretty limited, haha.

So that is my life. I have been taking my meds consistently for a week now, which is progress. And I can feel the difference it is starting to make in my energy levels and my ability to make good choices.

So now it comes down to having the courage to stick with it.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

it's my birthday!!!

I know I have not posted in forever, I have been sooooo busy with work! But work has been going really well, we made a lot of money at our booksale last week. Exciting.

I'm still working out with Janel - not doing great on the eating front, I really need to get back to tracking on MFP.

Today it is my birthday! I'm 26... yep, definitely need to run a marathon this year. =) My parents got me an awesome kitchen scale! It's a digital Biggest Loser one, which is going to work so much better than my old one. I can even put my own bowls on this one and then tare it. Niiiceee!!! I'm super excited to use it!

Well, this post was kind of lame. But I am still alive, very busy, except for today... today I am watching TV on my computer and will possibly clean my room. Also going to see Tenth Avenue North tonight. Yayyyy.

Hope you are all having good days!

Friday, October 1, 2010

big week!

Happy Friday, and Happy October everyone! Let's get the numbers out of the way first, and then I'll update you all on some other things going on with me. =)

Last Week's Weigh in: 225
This Week's Weigh in: 221.6 (-3.4)

Hooray! I am well on my way back down, and I'm hoping I can weigh in under 200 before Christmas vacation in Florida. I think it's doable!

So this week my blog celebrated a very special anniversary, but I forgot to tell you all! It was my 1 year blogiversary on Wednesday the 29th! A good part of the year was spent losing 50 pounds... and almost all the rest was spent gaining 30 of that back. For the past two weeks I've been pretty much on track though, and I am happy to report that with the help of My Fitness Pal and restarting my meds... I am back for good. =)

What else was I going to tell you? Oh, I decided to do the race on the 17th! I am not going out with any time goals other than to not get picked up by the bus, as I don't want a DNF. I'm going to do what L.B. (Muddy Runner) suggested, and take my camera. I will go out with the intent to have fun and take lots of pictures, and then post them on this blog and tell you allll about the race!

Okay, it is time for me to get ready for the day. I have at least a couple updates that I want to get posted this week, so come back soon!

Have a great day!

Monday, September 27, 2010

need advice, especially from runners...

So here is the deal. Last spring, I signed up for a marathon on October 17th. (Denver Rock and Roll.) After breaking my toe at the end of July, training was O-U-T for 6 weeks. I kept working out with my trainer and doing a very little non-impact cardio, as a lot of it hurt to do for awhile. Obviously, I could not train up for a full marathon, and I downgraded my entry to the Half.

I have not trained for the half either, and now it is 3 weeks away. I have been training twice a week with Janel, and am finally just getting back into the groove of doing cardio on my own - but none of it has been running.

I have done 3 half marathons before. I know the distance well. HOW bad of an idea would it be to do this race with little to no running training? (Or whatever running I can get in for the next 3 weeks...) As far as fitness goes, because I have been working really hard with Janel, I have not lost much, if any, fitness. In fact, I probably have more muscle than I have ever had.

I feel like I could do it - get out for some runs before the race, probably none over 7 or 8 miles though. And I know that I don't have to run the whole thing, in fact I am sure I wouldn't. I'd be happy to walk half of it and run half of it. I just LOVE the experience of being part of these big races.

So... do you think this is a crazy idea??? Let me know, please and thank you!!!

(p.s. I haven't posted since weigh in, but in case you were wondering, everything is going great! I have been tracking calories on My Fitness Pal and have been under every day since I started! I am very excited to weigh in later this week again, especially since I get to exercise more this week!)

Saturday, September 25, 2010

weigh in and other good things

Last weigh in (Monday): 230.2

Today's weigh in: 225 (-5.2)

YAY!!! I didn't get a chance to weigh in yesterday, which is my usual weigh in day, because I was babysitting overnight and wanted to use my own scale. I only got to work out twice these past 5 days, also because of the babysitting. But I stayed within my calories, and look - it worked!

One thing I have learned from My Fitness Pal so far is that I should be eating at least part (if not all) of my exercise calories. Now, if I go out for a half hour walk and burn 150 calories, it probably won't make a huge difference in my day if I eat them or not. However, on days when I work out with Janel, it is SO nice to be able to eat an extra 500 calories. I always find myself eating more on training days - both before, so that I have energy, and after, because I am starving.

I am kind of wondering if losing weight will look different this time around, since I've been working so hard with Janel. While I did gain back about 30 pounds... I can also still wear most of the same clothes. I am thinking 200 this time will look a lot different than 200 last time, since a greater part of my body weight is muscle now. At the very least, it will be interesting to find out.

Well it is about time for me to go scrounge up some breakfast. I have to work today (BLAH) but I think my boss and I are just going thrift shopping for some decorations for the office, which will at least be kind of fun. Then I'm babysitting again tonight for a new family. Thank you babysitting, for paying for another 10 sessions with Janel, hahaha.

Have a wonderful weekend, everyone!

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

i get to be a mom this week

As of 11 AM this morning until late late late on Friday night, I get to play mom. I am taking care of 4 kids (for the few hours I have them all), but mostly it is 2 or 3 I am watching at any given time. I get to pick them up at school, take them back in the morning, pick them up again, shuttle the older ones to and from soccer practices. (Yes, not only do I get to be a mom, but a soccer mom... haha.) I am a little nervous, but also excited. It will be fun to hang out with these kids for the next few days. Also, this family referred ANOTHER family to me, so now I am up to 3 families that I babysit for. Is it weird that I am 25 and babysitting? Am I the oldest babysitter ever?

I got out for a walk on Monday and worked out with Janel yesterday. Eating is also going well, and I have been tracking calories on My Fitness Pal, which is like Facebook for fitness. I am loving it over there! All in all, I am feeling good, and like I am on track. I still desperately want to eat the chocolates on my desk... but I will not do it.

Work is stressing me out like crazy... there is SO much going on, and it is hard to keep track of it all. Plus my boss is very dramatic, which I am used to dealing with, but it makes me want to stress eat SO BAD. And I'm not doing that anymore. Working out really helped after yesterday's workday, but with kids to pick up from school tonight and the next two nights, I have no time to workout. I know this family has cable though, so maybe after I get them to bed I can do some of the exercise videos that are On Demand. Or maybe I will grab my Shred DVD when I stop at home to get my meds. I am going to need to do something, I think.

What do you all suggest?

Monday, September 20, 2010

i need friends!

Okay, so I got a MyFitnessPal account last month... and then didn't use it. But I am starting today tracking my food and exercise on there, and I need some friends! My user name is kaitimae, if any of you have an account, can you find me? Or tell me how to find you? I am new to this site still, and haven't got it all figured out yet. Thanks!

Even though I did not really do the "No Numbers Challenge" like I had planned on doing, I weighed in this morning. I am up to 230.2, which is +3.8 from last month on the 20th. NO THANK YOU, SELF. That is just awful. Hence, starting to track food and exercise online, where I hope to have a few friends who will help keep me in line, and let me support them as well.

Also, I'm reinstigating Friday weigh-ins. Every Friday, unless I am on vacation with no access to a scale. I stopped because I was going through a lot with changing jobs, and the stress of it was overwhelming. However, it just led me to having ZERO accountability... which every single one of us knew would happen.

I'm going on a walk once I get home from work today. I haven't exercised outside in who knows how long. Perhaps I will take my camera and snap some pics to prove I went. =) Have a great Monday everyone - despite a crappy weigh in, I am super glad it has kicked me back on plan!!! (Also, big thanks to my meds, which are also helping me be positive and proactive!!!)

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

small changes

A big part of why I have been struggling these past months is, I believe, because I stopped taking my depression meds. BAD idea. I get to a point where I am doing well, and think I don't need them anymore. But that's not true. I am just doing well because they are working and doing their job. But now I am back on my meds, which I feel good about. I am far better able to make good decisions when I am taking them. Also, I have more energy and desire to get exercise.

Speaking of exercise, this morning I signed up for a program called "Move-tober." For four weeks in October, I am supposed to track my milage and my minutes of walking. The goal is to rack up either 600 minutes or 45 miles. (You have to choose between walking, running, or biking.) There are prizes at the end, and you can win prizes based on your designation. I am sure that I will spend a lot of my milage running, but I picked walking, as I am more likely to do that. Since I am just now getting back into running after I broke my toe, I don't want to set a milage goal that I can't acheive or that is likely to injure me.

I know I am not going to like what I see on the scale on September 20th. Why? Because I haven't done any of the things for the "No Numbers" challege after the first few days. However, I know that whatever I see on the 29th will be less than what I started with last year on the 29th when this journey began. That, I can feel good about.

My plan for the rest of September is to get a head start on a healthy October!

Monday, September 13, 2010

peach trees

I have two peach trees in the yard at my house. One is GIANT, and is producing some seriously delicious fruit. (I still cannot fathom that I am going to be eating FREE peaches for as long as they last. SO cool!) The other tree is little, and its peaches are just starting to look like they will actually ripen.

I have eaten... a couple peaches today, and made a peach crisp. Which I also ate like a quarter of. Hey, it's dinner! Tomorrow, my housemate Suzanne, a few of her friends, and I are going to make all manner of delicious peach things. Vodka, jam, butter, chutney? I think? I am also going to make freezer jam. Some for me, some for Christmas presents.

The bowl up top is just what we picked today, plus I took about 1/2 of that amount over to the neighbors house.

Peaches are delicious! Especially when you have them growing in your yard and can eat them pretty much off the tree.

Thursday, September 9, 2010


1) Post who gave you this award: Thanks so much to Sabrina at Life Is Not Always Black & White and to MargieAnne at nothingistoohard. I got this award months ago... but it is ALWAYS a good time to be happy! As much as I have been struggling lately, I think a positive attitude is what is keeping me from totally throwing in the towel. Thanks for the award, ladies. =)

2) State 10 things you like:
  • Exercise. I will drag my feet about it until I finally step up onto the treadmill, but I secretly do love working out. I love sweating, and feeling my muscles get stronger. I especially love sessions with Janel, because I leave feeling like Jello.
  • My job. It can get crazy busy and a little (okay, a lot) stressful, but I love it. I have great coworkers and wonderful volunteers that I get to see every week.
  • My neighbors. They are just genuinely nice people. I enjoy having friends that live next door, who are okay with me coming over to chat a few evenings every week.
  • Mountains. I don't think I will ever be able to move away from the mountains. They are just so beautiful, and provide endless places to play! (Or, you know, hike. Haha.)
  • Scotch Tape. I don't know why.
  • Breakfast foods. Waffles, scrambled eggs, cereal, cream of wheat... I love it all. I will eat breakfast foods for any meal, given the chance.
  • Autumn. While I do love Spring and Summer for their warm weather, I think Fall is my favorite season. I love the bite in the air, and being able to wear jeans and a sweater.
  • Books. I don't know how you people with Kindles do it. I love being able to collect and read physical books. I love how books can take you out of this world and deposit you in another, even if just for a few hours.
  • Football. I think this goes along with Fall being my favorite season. I love watching a good football game, especially if I am there in person! (And even more especially if it is the WOLVERINES!!!)
  • Music. Going to concerts, or just jamming out to iTunes in my room... I love me some good music.

3) Give this award to 10 other bloggers and notify them with a comment:

I'm cheating on this one. I don't have time to pass this on to 10 people, so I'm only passing it on to 5. Feel special, you 5! Haha.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

i keep going away and not meaning to!

Life just gets so busy sometimes! For example, last week I had a surprise root canal on Wednesday. I was expecting to get one done, sure, but not when I went in for my preliminary appointment. We got done with the xrays and the consult and they were like "Oh hey, we saved you a timeslot at 11 if you want to get the root canal done now!" It was not in my plan for the day, but I was happy to have it done. NO more tooth pain!!!

I was also pet/house sitting all last week, babysitting this weekend, and this week I am all over the place. I had training with Janel last night and nearly threw up. For reals. It was the first time I have ever felt that sick during training. Like I really had to work to not run to the bathroom. Luckily Janel is awesome and let me walk around, sit down, and she went and got cold paper towels and put them on my neck. It helped! We slowed down after that, but I finished the workout strong. I still don't really know what caused it, but it was a totally not fun experience. I am really going to miss working out with Janel. What with paying for the root canal and picking up paying for my student loans, I don't think I'll be able to afford training for awhile. Maybe if I get some money for Christmas... maybe.

Tonight I am meeting some friends for tea after work and we are going to discuss a Bible study that we are going to start doing together. I also volunteered to help with my church's new Wednesday evening service... I'm excited to be getting more involved with church and friends from church. Then tomorrow, one of my very best friends from college and her boyfriend are flying in just to visit for the weekend!!! I am super excited, I must say. We have some stuff planned, but will probably just enjoy hanging out and doing whatever. I'm for sure looking forward to going back to Ft. Collins and going on the New Belgium tour again. Yum yum.

On Sunday, I start singing with my new choir! I can't even explain how much I need this. Singing has been such a huge part of my life for such a long time, and now I have it back again. I think it will do so much for my happiness level.

A final note - I am bringing back rewards! I think if I have rewards that I really want (and can't have if I don't meet my goals!), I'll be more motivated to actually work on my health, haha. So the first reward is NEW ITUNES MUSIC!!! I have not bought music in a really long time, and just yesterday found an album that I really, really want. So I'm making that my reward for getting into the teens. 219.9 or lower, I get the music. Then I'll decide on another reward after that.

Well, that is all for now, I think. I must go back to work! Lunchtime is over!

Tuesday, August 24, 2010


After a long day at a social media conference, I did not have very many calories left to play with for dinner tonight - only about 200. So I got creative, and made an incredibly delicious omelette! Here's what was in it -

4 egg whites
1 oz light brie cheese
half a small tomato chopped up
garlic and herbs Mrs. Dash
1/4 cup salsa

It was sooooo good. In addition, I drank only water all day even though I was very tempted by the sodas at lunch. I also worked out with Janel. All in all, it was a good day. Janel did ask if I wanted to do measurements, and I said no, let's wait awhile since I just got my eating back on track. I don't know guys - something clicked with the start of this challenge. I am SO happy to be back on track, finally, finally, finally! I'm not thinking about how much I have to lose, just working on eating right, getting my exercise, and drinking mostly water. The rest will fall into place.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Day 3, checking in.

Well, I did not exercise today, since I hiked for like 3 hours yesterday. But eating has been great (1,617 calories), and I am drinking my water. I might make some tea in a bit here. It is pretty hot, but I'm getting a little bored of the plain water. And I'm not a huge fan of iced tea. We'll see!

I spent most of today going to church in the morning, and then cleaning my room and watching a lot of TV on my computer this afternoon. I'm working on laundry now, and I might even do some dishes. We got a new stove this weekend (had a gas leak a few weeks ago on the old one), and it has been soooooo nice to cook things again! So far I've made spaghetti, scrambled eggs, and cheese quesadillas. And I can say it is a very nice stove. It even came with a broiling pan! I am so excited to broil things! Steak... fish... yum.

That's all I've got tonight. See you all tomorrow. =)

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Challenge Day 2... and hiking pics from today!

So... day 2. As dumb as this is, I took today as my 1 day a week to not track calories. I know it is only day 2. But it is SO hard to track calories when I am hiking. We all share snacks, we eat things off bushes, we go out to eat at hole in the wall Himalayan restaurants. So it's a day off. Tomorrow will be back to the grind once more. On a good note, I have had lots and lots of water today!

I'm beat, and I have a ton of stuff to do here, mainly, clean my room. So I shall leave you with lots of pictures from today's hike, mostly wildflowers.

Beautiful pink wildflowers.

Neat looking tree.

I "antiqued" this with iPhoto.

Spooky trees.

Lovely purples.

Wild raspberries eaten off the bush are calorie-free, right?

A neat broken sign post in sepia tone.

Such lovely colors!

Red Indian Paintbrush flowers with mountains in the background.

Friday, August 20, 2010

Day one

I am wrapping up Day 1 on the new challenge. So far, I feel that I have succeeded, though I cut it close with the calories today!

Calories Consumed: 1,695 (Trying to stay between 1500-1700, so just eked in under the line.)

Exercise: 1 hour on the treadmill on "Calorie Burn" mode, which switched up the ramp the whole time. I burned 545 calories, according to the treadmill. I'll take it!

Water: So far, I have had 4 full water bottles (so 96 oz. total) as well as a glass of water at breakfast. Yay!

The rest of the evening will be spent showering, maybe watching a show on Hulu, and getting ready to go hiking tomorrow morning with my work group.

Happy Friday, everyone!

Challenge beginning!

Today marks the start of the challenge I discussed in yesterday's post. (Go look! There are hiking pictures there, too!)

Here are my starting stats. Then I'm putting the scale and the measuring tape away for a month until the last day of the challenge on September 20th.

Weight: 226.4
Waist: 42
Hips: 51
Calf: 16.5
Thigh: 27

I didn't really feel like doing any other measurements. I think those will be fine. So there you have it. Not in a good place weight wise, that is for sure. But, it is a good starting point for a challenge such as this.

I am off to a excellent start this morning with raisin bran, skim milk, and key lime yogurt. Now I must go to pack my healthy lunch and my gym bag!

Happy Friday, everyone!

Thursday, August 19, 2010

A new challenge, and Grays Peak pictures!

Let's start with the pictures! Here is a picture I took at the very start of the hike. You have to get over a bridge and turn a corner before you can see these guys, but really, we hadn't gone far at all before we could see them. The peak on the left is Grays, and the peak on the right is Torreys. Yes, they are just as far away as they look. From where this pictures was taken, it's just under 4 miles to the top of Grays.

This little guy is a Pika. They are super cute. They are kind of like real, live, squeaky toys. They squeak all the time, and I took it as a personal challenge whenever I heard a squeak to look around to see if I could find the Pika. I found this one!

And also this one, with the crazy eyes. I don't know if you can really see it in this picture, but he was collecting food or grass or something.

Okay, okay, back to mountains. I was fairly high up when I took this one. Just a lovely picture of the valley below!

Cool looking rock formation.

The view from the summit! Pictures will never do it justice. As soon as I got to the top, I nearly started crying. It was just so incredibly stunning. I have never seen anything quite as beautiful.

More valley! If you look closely, you can see the path... it's the tiny white line snaking about the middle of the picture, then you can follow it along the right side of the little hill there.

Here is a picture of Torreys peak from the summit of Grays. I did not have the chance to go over there, but I'll get it next time!

A nice man agreed to take a picture of me at the summit! I am exhausted and windblown, but I have to say... I've never felt as strong as I did when this picture was taken.

Now onto the challenge part of the post. Lindsay of Prior Fat Girl fame was challenged by one of her readers, and she extended that challenge out to the rest of us. And I think it is a great idea to jump into! I'm in the process of getting back on track, and feeling pretty good about it, but who can't use a great challenge? And this will be a challenge. Here are the rules that Lindsay is going by, with my tweaks and specifications in bold.

1. On Day 1, weigh in, take measurements, and then put away the scale and the measuring tape for one month. So the challenge is going August 20-September 20.

2. Stay within your calories 6 days a week. My calorie goal is between 1500 and 1700 per day.

3. Drink only water. (No diet soda.) I am all for giving up the soda, but I am allowing orange juice and skim milk in addition to water. Water will be, however, probably 90-95% of what I drink.

4. Work out 4-5 days a week.

5. At the end of the month (September 20) weigh and measure again.

So there it is! I will be checking in tomorrow morning with my weight (it's gonna be ugly, folks, be prepared!) and measurements. I'm getting really excited for this challenge. I am so, so ready to be back on track.

Goodnight, my friends! Sweet dreams of mountains and pikas to you all!

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

i am alive

I am still here. I have been so busy at work lately, and then I come home and crash. I watch a show or two on Hulu and hit the sack. This weekend was especially busy.

On Saturday I went out with two of my housemates and we went hiking. I summitted my first 14er, Grays Peak, in 4 hours and 30 minutes. My housemates did both Grays and Torreys in that same amount of time, but I'm not trying to worry abut how fast or slow I was. I climbed a freaking 14,000+ foot mountain. It was awesome. I have a ton of pictures and a 360 degree view from the summit video that I will post later this week.

Saturday night, Sunday, and Monday I spent hanging out with my brother, who was in town for a few days before heading back to Michigan. It was great to see him. We kept busy watching movies, swimming, grilling, hot tubbing, and watching more movies. Oh, and going out to eat at the AMAZING breakfast restaurant Snooze, in Denver. Probably the most delicious food I have ever eaten. Ever. If any of you ever come to visit me, I will take you there.

Speaking of eating, today at least, is going well. Having Janel's support is so great, I honestly can't even tell you. She is worth far, far more than I pay. She is giving me recipes when we meet again on Thursday. She is my main motivation to get back on track. I want to do well in personal training - and I am. But I would be doing so much better if my eating was on track. Today, finally, I feel like I have it together again.

I had some raisin bran for breakfast. A handful of nuts for a midmorning snack. And for lunch just now I had a Lean Cuisine, a yogurt, and will eat a banana here in a few more minutes. I am feeling very proud of myself today!

That's all for now, I guess. I have to get back to work! I will try and get pics up tonight or tomorrow. =)

Tuesday, August 10, 2010


I think I am dehydrated. I have been really terrible about drinking my water for the past week, and I have been feeling very blah and tired. And I think it is because I need more water. Yes indeed. So I am filling up on it now! Especially with hiking coming up this weekend, being hydrated is essential. The more I can do to avoid altitude sickness, the better, I say.

I really didn't have much else to update on besides that. I have personal training tonight, I am going to ask to do weights. Just because I always need a day or two of recovery from weights and I don't want to wear my legs out on Friday before a 9 mile, (hopefully ) 2 summit hike.

Monday, August 9, 2010


I am SOOOO excited for this weekend. This Saturday, along with my housemates and a friend, I am going to hike some 14ers. We are doing Grays and Torreys peaks. They are about an hour from Denver, which means we don't have to camp out the night before - we just need to leave early in order to ensure a good parking spot. (And a good parking spot means the difference between a 9 mile round trip and a 15 mile round trip.)

I am confident that I can summit at least one, if not both, of these peaks. I have been out hiking this summer and did well, even at 12,00o+ feet. I will bring lots of water and snacks so that 14,000+ is doable. I even got new clothes today! I went shopping at REI and came away with a membership, a pair of gray capri length hiking pants, and a white North Face hoodie that was on sale. Good deal. I am wearing them around the house now... they are so comfy... hehe. Thank you, REI, for having size 16 pants.

I cannot wait to go play in the mountains. I have not done enough of it, even living as close as I do. I just love being in nature and surrounded by beautiful scenery. My camera can't wait either. =) Hooray hooray hooray!!! I am so happy and excited for this weekend!

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

buddy taped

Don't you think this whole healthy living process would be a lot easier if we were all buddy taped together? You would never ever be able to sneak ice cream or get away with not going out for your daily walk. Yes, it would make some things easier, having someone to look out for you. It could also make it a lot more annoying.

Speaking of buddy taping, yesterday was the first day I made it all day with my toes taped together. The whole first week of it being broken, I could not stand to have things touching the toe. I would walk around the office without shoes because it was more comfortable than having even the littlest part of my shoe touch my foot. But since I can now effectively buddy tape it to the toe next to it, I say my toe is on the way to healing. Hooray!

I changed my registration for the race in October to a half marathon instead of the full. Still a little bummed about that, but I guess it just wasn't my time. Now I'm looking towards the spring for a full marathon. I am also planning on doing a Triathalon next summer... Janel and her other clients who did the Tri on Sunday convinced me. I'm doing it.

What with not being allowed to run for the next month, I'm struggling to get in my exercise. I still work out with Janel twice a week, and she accomodates my toe very well. I just can't do things like mountain climbers. (Nor do I miss them...) Other than that, I can bike, do the elliptical, and swim. My gym has no pool, so that leaves the first two. I am working a fundraiser tomorrow through Saturday, so my plan is to be in the gym at least 4 days a week after this weekend. 5, if I can swing it time wise.

Yesterday I went to the grocery store and got $86 of all organic groceries. I got a lot of food, too! It should last me at least a week and a half, if not 2 weeks. I am excited to start making the switch to only organic food. I know I won't be able to control what I eat when I go out, but at home and at work, I am really working on making the healthiest possible choices.

That's it for now, everyone. Thanks for all your wonderful comments lately! I know I need to reply to a lot of you still! Going to try to by this weekend!

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

kinda heartbroken

Health-wise, the worse possible news ever would probably be hearing that I could never ever run again.

The second worst news is hearing that I can't run for 6 weeks. I broke my toe this morning, and the doctor said running is the worst thing I could do, and I'm not allowed to even TRY until my toe feels 100% better and doesn't hurt at all.

Which means that I will not be able to run a full marathon this fall. I am really sad. I was planning the marathon for my 26th birthday and now I can't do it. I WILL run a marathon in my 26th year though, don't think I won't. As far as this fall... I know that Janel will keep me in shape even though I'll have to do some different exercises now. I am confident that I will be able to run the half marathon in October. But it really bums me out that I won't be ready for the full.

Monday, July 26, 2010

starting over

Starting over is hard. I am still not all the way back to my usual habits, but I'm getting there for sure. Today I weighed in at 215, which is 4.4 pounds down from last Saturday's 219.4. I am going in the right direction again, hooray! While it sucks having to lose weight that I've already lost once, I am just thanking God that I didn't gain back all 50 pounds. 20 is bad enough.

I am getting excited for this process again. I am excited to gain back my control, and it is happening just a little more every day. I am excited to reattain my weight in the 100's, especially since I know it will look different than the last time I was there, because I have been working so hard with Janel.

Speaking of working with Janel... I am loving the changes I can feel in my body. I feel stronger, especially my back and shoulders. My shoulders even look more defined, which is so cool! I am also noticing that I am gaining stamina. In my first session with Janel, "bicycles" were so incredibly hard. Last week, I did 2 sets and made it through each of them thinking, "Wow, okay, that wasn't so bad! I didn't even think about wanting to take a break!" I am so proud of that. My next goal is to be able to do a whole set of standard pushups. NO knees on the floor. I did ONE just now, so I know that I will soon be able to work up to doing several in a row, and then a whole set.

In other news, yesterday was our lease signing for the house I am living in! My new roommates came over and we met with our landlord and signed the new lease. I am so happy that 1) I don't have to move, and 2) That my new roommates are awesome. (That said, my current ones are awesome as well and I will miss them!)

Lastly, a question: Do any of you cook just for yourself? If you do, do you have any good cookbooks or websites for small recipes? I love my current cookbooks (Jillian's Master Cookbook, BL cookbook, some others that I have picked up at work), but most of them have recipes that serve 4 people. I don't mind occaisionally having leftovers or freezables, but I don't have a ton of fridge/freezer space either, since I'm sharing with 3 other people. Any resources y'all can give me would be much appreciated!

Wednesday, July 21, 2010


My trainer, Janel, trains a group of women every summer to do triathalons. Some of the women in the group are going to be doing the marathon in October and asked her to get them ready for it, and Janel invited me along on their Saturday runs starting in August. Sure, why not, I said. Then she invited me to come to the barbeque the group was having after their triathalon on the 1st. Somehow, I get the feeling I am going to be doing a triathalon next summer... I have to say, I am getting more than just personal training sessions for the money I paid. It is so obvious that Janel really cares how I am doing and wants to help and include me in things that she knows I would like. That just feels really good.

Speaking of feeling good... thank you all so much for your comments on my previous entry. I can't tell you how much every one of them meant to me, and how some of them even made me cry a little. I would never be able to make it through this journey without you all alongside me. I may have fallen, but what got me up was the rest of you being so kind and helpful and supportive. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Today was the first day where I have felt really good about my food intake. I had some raisin bran, yogurt, and cranberry juice for breakfast. I had an Eating Right frozen meal for lunch, along with an apple and peanut butter and another yogurt. I had a whole fruit popsicle for an afternoon snack, and now I am about to have delicious veggie filled stir fry for dinner! I just got back from a 3.5 mile run, so it is going to taste extra good I think!

Saturday, July 17, 2010


I'm sure you can all figure out why I haven't been weighing in, or posting as much. I have spent the last few weeks... months... out of control. I simply have forgotten how to say "no", how to plan ahead, how to make good decisions. I have been eating whatever the hell I want to.

And I can't do that. I just can't. I need to completely re-teach myself everything I learned last October when I first started this journey. It's really embarrassing. I feel terrible writing this. I weighed myself this evening, even though I said I wasn't going to. 219.


I can't believe I let myself get to this point again. Guys, I need help. It's like I see a number I don't want on the scale... or one of my shirts starts to get tight again... and I panic. And when I panic, I eat.

One of the other big things I am having a problem with is taking my meds. I keep forgetting to take them, and it is really screwing with me. I feel so much better when I take them, and I really do think they help me make better decisions. So why can't I remember to take them? It's not like it's a hard thing to do.

I'm going to go now. I'm going to get some of my weight loss books out and read them while I do laundry tonight. I am going to prep for my long run tomorrow, and then tomorrow morning, I am going to do it. I am going to plan tonight what I am going to eat tomorrow, and I'm not going to let anything stop me from staying on track. And I'm not going to focus on anything beyond tomorrow. If I try that, it's going to send me right back into panic mode.


Tuesday, July 13, 2010

2 weeks!!?!?!?!

Okay, it's been two weeks since I last updated. That is unacceptable. Although, I was very busy in the meantime...

This weekend I was in New York being a bridesmaid in a wedding for one of my very good college friends. It was incredibly fun, and a beautiful wedding, but I am still so exhausted from it all. The wedding, the traveling back and forth to the wedding, the not sleeping a lot because I was rooming with my college roommate at the hotel and we had lots of catching up to do. Excuses, excuses. Change of subject...

I went from January 4th 2009 to sometime in March with no soda and extremely little caffiene.

Why am I bringing this up? Because I'm starting again. It's something I have done before, and I know I can do it again. I have been drinking more of both lately, and I just plain don't like how it makes me feel. So no more soda or caffiene until after July 13th, 2011. If then, even.

Okay, well, it's off to work for me. I need to get some water and then settle down and get some work done. Hope you are all having a great Tuesday!

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

it just figures...

I go to the grocery store on Sundays usually. After church, before dinner and jazz with my neighbors. I usually feel like I look pretty cute, since I'm still kind of dressed up from church. I only ever see families and older couples.

Today I went to the grocery store after my workout with Janel. And the grocery store? FULL of guys. I am so serious right now. It's like every attractive male decided to go shopping tonight. And I am still in my ridiculously sweaty workout clothes. UGH. Hahaha. Just thought that was a funny story.

Truly, I don't care what anyone thinks about how I look after a workout. I mean, I feel awesome, and that's all that matters. Also, I especially don't care about guys at the grocery store... (Read: I might kind of care what one of neighbor boys thinks... but SHH!)

Anyway... my workout with Janel was insane today. I really felt like I was going to throw up a couple times, but I didn't, thank God! Here is what we did:

20 low jumping jacks
6 down-dog push-ups
30 mountain climbers
10 low plank leg lifts (10 per leg, btw.)
20 "supermans"
20 crunch style toe touches
10 leg lifts
20 crunch style toe touches
20 "supermans"
10 low plank leg lifts
30 mountain climbers
6 down-dog push ups
20 low jumping jacks

Even ONE cycle of this was so hard. We did FOUR. I was literally dripping sweat onto the mat after just one cycle. By the end of the hour, I was totally soaked. It was awesome. But Janel said next time we are doing it as a time trial... hopefully not til towards the end of my training. Apparently some people can do 4 cycles in like, 20 minutes. I am really thinking about doing this again, though, on my own. I mean, it was a great workout, and I can do everything without any equipment. It is a perfect "portable" workout... I think I'll try it next week when I am traveling for a wedding I'm in. Plus, the more practice I can get in on it, the better I'll do on my time trial, whenever that may be...

Well, despite the fact that I'm running in the morning, I am still going to shower tonight. I'm a sweaty sticky mess! (I know you really wanted to know!) I'm just going to rinse off though. Shampooing and the like can wait til after my morning run.

Happy Tuesday evening, everyone!!!

p.s. I feel SO happy right now! What a great mood! Thanks, endorphins!!!

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

I am a busy bee!

I really am. It seems that my calendar is just getting more and more filled with wonderful things. Between work, personal training, and marathon training, there isn't a whole lot of room for other things. Yet I have also managed to squeeze in babysitting, dinner with a church friend, church, picking up my bridesmaid's dress and a Saturday field trip to Fort Collins. And that is just this week!

So I did something on Tuesday. I promised Janel (my personal trainer) that I would write down everything I ate for the next week. I am not keeping track of calories, though. That's just too much for me right now. But I am writing down what I am eating and when I am eating it. Even just knowing that Janel expects me to do this is keeping me on track.

Marathon training is going smoothly. I am training to finish, not for any sort of time goal, so it isn't very intense yet. I ran 5 miles on Sunday, and 3 yesterday. Tomorrow is 4, Saturday 3, and Sunday 6. Then I get a rest day on Monday before killing it at the gym with Janel on Tuesday. Training is really helping. I can literally feel myself getting stronger. I am going to have rock hard muscles in no time!

You might have noticed that I didn't do a weigh in post on Friday. Here are my reasons:

1. I was running late. (This is true, I was, I swear!)
2. I was up 5 pounds. 5 POUNDS!

There is no way that was real weight, and sure enough, the next day I was back down again.

I am just so tired of fighting myself. Fighting to get out the door to run. Fighting to choose healthy foods and appropriate amounts of them to eat. So, so, so tired of fighting. And the scale is not helping. I am finding that I am putting far too much emphasis on what it says. What I should be doing is focusing on how great I feel after completing an hour with Janel or a long run. On how muscles all over my body are just the slightest bit sore, even two days after training. I should be caring about what food I am fixing for myself, and celebrating when I make good choices.

I'm not going to post Friday weigh ins for awhile. Not until I can stop freaking out about what the scale says. Until then, I will still update on Friday (and sporadically throughout the week as well), but I will update with all the positive things I have done during the week.

I am very slowly climbing off this plateau that I have been stuck on for the last 2 months. And it is painfully slow, but I'm getting there.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

just thinking

I am really loving Jillian's new show, Losing It. I watched the most recent episode this morning on Hulu, and it's had me thinking all day. If I really loved myself, I would be taking better care of my body. I would be eating healthier and exercising more. But as you all know, I've really been struggling with that lately, although I do think I'm on the right track to regaining the momentum I had before this ridiculously long plateau.

Personal training today was awesome. My limbs feel like jello. And I really love Janel, my trainer. She is so easy to talk to, and she really pushes me. Which is what I'm paying for, haha. I'm going to be sad when this round of training is over if I can't afford more. Maybe I will be able to, maybe not, who knows. But I am loving it so far. It's another thing that has me thinking though... I am paying for training to be stronger, and help me lose weight. And anything I do contrary to that, like putting junk in my body, is basically screwing myself over. Going to training is making me really think about my nutrition priorities, I must say.

If I'm going to do this... personal training, as well as marathon training... I need to do it right.

Monday, June 14, 2010


Happy 1st day of marathon training, everyone! Or, okay, maybe I'm just saying that to myself. =)

Today is the first day of marathon training. I ran a measly 3 miles on the treadmill, but I felt awesome. Somehow, today, I feel like a marathoner. I mean, I really feel different! I don't know why this is, but I like it! I desperately want to shower, but I am doing 4 miles in the morning tomorrow. It would kind of be a waste of water to shower tonight and also in the morning. Instead, I'm going to give myself a pedicure. My feet could use a little TLC, I think.

Confession: whenever I haven't gotten mail in a long time, I usually go to Amazon and buy something. It's almost always a book, and it is also always a book that I end up keeping. Today I really wanted to buy books about marathoning. But be proud of me: instead, I whipped out my library card and ordered NINE books to be delivered to my library. For free. Probably most of them I would not want to keep but if there is one or two that are really super useful, maybe I will buy them in the future. I am pretty sure I will have cleaned out the library of marathoning books for a couple weeks at least, hahaha.

Last but not least! Have you checked out the daily 3 yet? If you haven't, come check it out! (And then send me an email to join! Basically, it's a community where we all post 3 goals every day and then offer support to everyone else. So far, there are really only 2 of us posting, and we have a small band of followers. I am pretty sure if you want to join the community though, you don't even need to be a follower - the blog will show up on your dashboard and you can get to it that way! So come on over! I have found it very helpful so far, and I'm enjoying starting to think of new ways to challenge myself with my goals.

Friday, June 11, 2010

the daily 3

I realized I have a few more minutes before I need to go to work. So I started a new blog... and I want you to write for me! (And don't worry, this blog isn't going anywhere!)

The new blog is called The Daily 3. The purpose? For members to post 3 goals, every day. (Or as many days a week as you want, when you get the chance.) Once you have done a post, the next day, if you want to, you can give a quick recap of how you did with the previous days goals before posting your new goals. Also, your goals don't have to change day to day - if you are still working on something, go ahead and tackle that goal every day for as long as you need to!

So much of this weight loss/management journey is about reaching goals - whether they are weight related, general health related, exercise related. And it really does help to have people asking you... how did you do today? I would hope that members would comment on the entries of the other people posting... not all of them, obviously, but when you can. I want us to be a team.

Interested in joining? Leave a comment with your email address, or shoot me an email at I'll invite people until Blogger tells me I can't. (So, I can have 99 more people, at this point.)

Here's the link to the new blog:

Have a great day! =)

turning it around

Last week: 203.4
This Week: 203.2 (-.2)

Well, at this rate, I will reach my goal in like, 3 years. NO thanks! Instead of focusing on how lame it is that I am only down .2, let's focus on the good things I have been doing.

1. I have been getting a lot more water these past few days.

2. I have been packing my lunch for work. And eating a lot less crap at work.

3. I went to the gym... but only yesterday. I am going tonight though, for my session with Janel. And I'm long running on Sunday. Official marathon training for October starts Monday. I'm super excited, and also insanely nervous.

That's it guys. Sorry so short, but I have to go to work! Long day with lots of stuff to do before training. But here are my goals for today... I'll report when I get back tonight, with a write up of my training session.

1. Drink at least 5 glasses of water at work.
2. No soda. (Backslid much on this one...)
3. No chocolate or snacks other than popcorn at work, unless they are snacks I bring from home.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

a few things to say

1. I am completely in love with the new Blogger templates and layouts and such. I am taking a break from black and pink for this nice summery background. I really like it a lot!

2. I have a training session with Janel tomorrow. I might die. I can't wait!

3. At my gym, they have bikes that are practically video games. You have to steer, and you have a screen that shows the path you are doing. They also have a game. You ride your bike, and steer around to pick up coins. Once you have a coin of a certain color, then you have to go catch a dragon of the same color. Some dragons are at the tops of hills, or are really fast, so you get more points for catching those ones. These dang dragons are going to make me enjoy riding the bike.

4. Have you checked out the pages at the top of my blog? I have one called "50 Pounds" which consists of photos of items that are around 50 pounds. My mom helped me take them at Target. The other is progress pics... and I just added a new one! It's a terribly lighted self picture I took with the help of a mirror, but nonetheless, it is the first of my "during" pictures. In this photo, I actually have a waistline. How exciting!

5. Off to open my windows and enjoy the sounds and smells of the thunderstorm!

Friday, June 4, 2010

quick update

Last Week: 204

This Week: 203.4 (-.6)

Half a pound. Better than nothing, and a move in the right direction, but still, SO frustrating. I will admit that this week has been crazy hectic though. One of our biggest fundraisers of the year for work starts this morning, and the last two days have been set-up and prep for it. Today is going to be insane. It's a book sale, and on the first day is when all the bookdealers come, and just tons of people in general so they can have first pick. (Too bad for them I took all the good books already, haha! Okay, well, I took 16 of the good books... out of 95,000.)

Also we have had people cooking for us and all our volunteers, so I've been eating the provided food instead of my own, which I am sure contributes to the small loss.

Well, I have a lot to do today! I have to be at the sale by 7:45, but I also have to stop at the grocery store for supplies, and at Starbucks for a coffee, or I will not make it through the morning. I'm not one for drinking caffeine, and I will be glad when I can stop again next week, but it is going to be pretty dang necessary for the next few days.

Monday, May 31, 2010

Bolder Boulder Race Report

Holy cow, you guys. This was the most fun race I have ever run. It was so awesomely entertaining, and even funny at times. There were lots of people in costume (which I SO want to do next year, but not on my own... volunteers?), great music several times a mile, TONS of spectators, some of who were passing out the following: marshmallows (really, more thrown at us than passed, haha), bacon (2 stations!), donuts, peanuts, lemonade, otter pops, beer, jungle juice, and tequila shots. None of these were official - just people out in front of their house, haha. It was grand. There were also lots and lots of sprinklers, which was so nice. It was HOT by the time my wave got started at 8:49:10.

My personal goal was to be in under 1:20. I didn't achieve it - my final time was 1:22:13. Which isn't bad! I loved that BB tracked our splits. My fastest mile was 12:04 (WOWZER!), and that was mile 1. My slowest mile was 13:53, which was mile 4. Overall, my average mile time was 13:14, which is 29 seconds per mile faster than my half marathon times from two weeks ago. While it is obviously a shorter race, and I did push it a little extra due to the shorter distance, I am more than pleased to have knocked 29 seconds off my average mile time.

While I didn't hit my goal time, I did still PR! I bettered my 10K time by 17:12. I just can't bring myself to be disappointed. I have a new 10K PR, and I had an amazing, amazing time running this morning.

I highly recommend doing the Bolder Boulder if you never have. It was such a great experience. Also, it is the 2nd largest 10K in the nation. There were 56,000+ running today. That's bigger than a lot of marathons! Anyway. Incredible morning. I didn't stay to watch the pros run, but my housemate Carter did. Can't wait to hear what that was like. I probably would have stayed if

1. I thought I could have found Carter in the mass of people.
2. If I had brought sunscreen. Thank god for the volunteer coming around with sunscreen while we were waiting for our time to go. I am sure I sweated it off within a mile or two, but it helped. I am a little dark, but not burned.

Now I am debating whether I want to go lay out in the backyard or if I want to shower and go shopping for a swimsuit... I think I will go with the latter, and then if it is still hot out when I get back, I can lay out.

Lastly... should you decide you want to come do Bolder Boulder next year, let me know. I have couches! =)

Sunday, May 30, 2010

let me tell you what

It is HOT here these days!!! It doesn't even bother me that much that it's been like 90 degrees lately, since there isn't really much humidity. Still, when I was out picking my race packet for tomorrow, I also stopped at Target and picked up some running shorts, a new sports bra, and a running tank. GOOD IDEA, self. Yesterday evening I went out for a run, it ended up being about 4 miles. I really want to run today, but I'm not going to, seeing as how I have the BolderBoulder tomorrow morning. (A 10K.)

Last night I found out awesome news - I am not going to have to move in July! I met with my future housemates this weekend and we were originally just going to talk about moving in together, and where we might like to find a house. But then they decided they really liked the house I live in now, and the boyfriend of one of the girls is going to move in too! So the four of us will be living in the house I am in now. HOORAY! I am thrilled not to have to move, and I am so excited to live with Tanya and Suzanne and Mike. In celebration, I cleaned and rearranged my room. Gotta change things up every once in awhile, right? Especially since I'll be here another year.

Well I had probably better get out and about... have to shower and then go to the store for grocery shopping. Then it's church, and scoping out where I need to park to catch the shuttle to Boulder tomorrow!

I hope you are all having excellent holiday weekends... anyone doing anything exciting?

Friday, May 28, 2010

told you, not pretty

Starting Weight: 250.3
Last Weigh In: 199.6

Today: 204

UGH. +4.4

I knew it was going to be bad. I deserve it after these past few weeks. But I'm owning up to it now, I ate a lot of crap and didn't exercise. That's changed though. I'm back at it with a vengeance. May was a pretty big gain month. But that trend is over now. The end.

I had a great workout last night, and I'm feeling it today. I have exactly two weeks until I meet with Janel again. So my goal is to be back in the 190s by that time.

I can do it. I will do it.

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Goal weight reward suggestions, anyone?

Hey friends!

So after sleeping extremely well last night, I woke up today so sore. From those dang 18 pushups. I felt it throughout the day as I would reach for things at my desk. Then, right as I was walking into my gym after work... I got a muscle cramp in my arm. Yikes! So much worse than just being sore! I kind of massaged it for a few minutes and then got to working out. Might as well, right? I think exercising actually kind of helped loosen it up, which is good. I did half an hour on the elliptical and then half an hour on the treadmill. I was very much sweaty when I left. I put in about 4.5 miles between the two machines and burned a little over 500 calories. Gooooood workout.

Tomorrow is weigh in day. I haven't done it since the first week of the month. I've been slacking, and we all know it. But weigh in will happen. It won't be pretty... but I will deal. I am feeling good about the future, and I know that I am not stopping this process of becoming healthier anytime soon.

I was thinking while I was showering after dinner just now, that I am going to redo my rewards system. I think for the rest of this time, I am going to do rewards at every 10 pounds. 60 pounds lost (190) will still be mani/pedis with Carter, provided she is still in town. (Oh gosh, it better come sooner than the end of July!!) 70 pounds down (180) will be... some new running gear that I am sure I will need for my marathon training - probably new shoes, a fuel belt, socks, shorts maybe. That kind of stuff.

80 pounds down (170) will be... I don't know yet! At 170 I may be winding down the weight loss and starting to focus more on maintenance and/or finishing up marathon training. (I hope this is how the timeline goes anyway...) If you all have good suggestions for a final goal prize, let me know. I have an idea... but I want to hear what you all have to say! You might think of something totally better than what I am thinking!

Well, it is time for me to relax on the couch and watch my Netflix movie, The Time Traveler's Wife. I've heard it is very sad, but I have been wanting to watch it for awhile.

See you all back here tomorrow morning!

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

redefining my goals

Tonight was my first official session of personal training, in which we mostly did fitness testing.

Before we did any of the tests, Janel took measurements. She did caliper measurements on 7 different parts of my body, and took a bunch of girth measurements as well. We didn't do anything with these numbers until the end of the session. Next were the fitness tests.

First we did sit ups. I was a few below average for my age. Then we did pushups. For someone who has never done a pushup ever, I did 18 in a minute. And I am STILL feeling it! Haha. I was a little more below average on these than the sit ups. However, Janel did say that I had very good form, and that is really good to see, even though I am below average on reps! After that, we did a flexibility test, which I was still slightly below average on. Ah well. Next we did a heart rate test on the treadmill, spending 2 each minutes in increasing heart rate zones. So for 2 minutes my heart rate was between 110-120. Then I spent 2 minutes between 120-130. And so on, until I finished with 2 minutes at about 165ish. This was my favorite test... because I got to run on a treadmill. I am good at that. =)

Then after cooling down we sat down in the office and she did all sorts of calculations with the measurements. This is where redefining goals comes in.

According to the caliper tests, about 126 of my current ~200 pounds are lean muscle. This is apparently very good! After doing some calculations for my goal body fat percentage (24-26%), my goal weight is... 170.

While part of me is disappointed that I may never reach 100 pounds lost, most of me is relieved. For one thing, that means I may only have about 30 pounds left to lose instead of 50. Also, I mentioned that it seemed to me to be a high number for someone who is as short as I am (I'm 5'4"). Janel assured me that yes, I may be shorter, but I just naturally have a more muscular build, and to get much lower than that weight, I would be losing muscle mass, not fat, and that isn't a good idea. I can't argue with that. Even if caliper tests have a little bit of a margin of error, I doubt that it would change my goal weight very much. Maybe 5 pounds, at most, is my completely uneducated and random guess.

So I may never weigh less than 165 or 170. I think I'm okay with that. It might take a little getting used to. I can't deny the fact that being at goal weight by the end of the summer would be amazing. And, I think, attainable.

I was also surprised that my goal calorie intake for the day should be around 1850. I am excited that part of this training package includes working with Janel on food as well. She is sending me info for the website she and all the rest of her clients use for tracking food and exercise, and then she will be able to see what I am doing and make suggestions. I think I am getting my money's worth, that's for sure.

Because we are both very busy next week, our next session is scheduled for Friday, June 11th, with a possible session before than on the 9th, if she has time. We are going to try to get in two sessions a week, but if there are some weeks with just one, that will be fine too. I am pretty good at staying on track as far as exercise goes.

I am really, really excited about training this summer. I think with Janel's help, I will reach my goals faster, and stay more motivated as well.

Things are looking up! Now I am off to have a quick snack (it's 9:45 already? EEP!), a shower, and bed!

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

working through things

I have been struggling with my weight a long time. Maybe for 15-ish years. More than half my life, at least.

When I started exercising a lot and eating healthier back in October, I knew my life had changed forever. And I still feel that way.

But it is so much a harder struggle now that I am half done. For me, it's not getting easier. At least it hasn't lately. All I did today was eat. I even had a PLAN last night for today... and I didn't follow through. These days, it is far more likely I have a bad day than a good day.

This isn't how my big change is supposed to be going.

It's so easy to feel disheartened when you get off track during this process. This isn't the first time that I've "fallen off the wagon" so to say. And I've always gotten right back on. It's taking me longer this time, but I'm catching up.

It's the hard times like these that really make you examine... why AM I doing this?

I want to be healthier. I want to be able to shop in whatever store I want. I want to surprise my college friends who haven't seen me in a couple years at a wedding this summer. I want to RUN ridiculously long distances. I want to look better. I want to have more energy.

I'm keeping at it. I am realizing more and more every day just how FOR LIFE this whole thing is. It's a little scary!

I am really excited to go to the gym tomorrow and have my first training session with Janel (had to cancel last week due to the tooth). The first session is mostly fitness testing. And I am going to do my very best. I am one of those crazy people that loves exercise, as much as it hurts. I WANT Janel to kick my ass, haha. (I guess I wouldn't be paying for it if I didn't, huh?)

I'm not sure where I wanted to go from here. Maybe there is nothing more to say tonight. I ordered two cookbooks from Amazon today, and I am hoping they will have some new recipes and ideas for me. I am not so good at thinking of things to make, especially healthy things. Revamping my food plan is most of what I need to do to be back on track. And I will. Even if it means cooking my own food most nights of the week, I'll do it.

A random thought to end this post with:

I really wish I liked salad more.

Goodnight, friends.

Saturday, May 22, 2010


Sorry it's been so long since I posted! Most of the past week consisted of me going to work and then coming home and being in bed by 8 at the latest... usually by 7:30 though. Yesterday I managed to stay up until 11... but then I slept until 11 this morning, haha. I am still taking Percocet to control my tooth pain, but I've only needed to use it at night. The rest of the time I can get by with ibuprofen. I'm also taking lots of antibiotics.

I really hope that I can go for a run tomorrow. It is killing me not to be running, but I am so tired all the time. It was so nice today, but I pretty much stayed inside and laid around all day. I feel like a bum.

Wednesday and Thursday I forgot to take my regular morning meds... which are my antidepressants and my birth control. So in addition to tooth stuff, I've also got crazy random hormones going on too. Bleh. My weight has been up and down this week, and by the time I realized I should have weighed in, it was Friday afternoon. So I just said forget it, I'll get back to it next week.

Well... it is 9:30, and I was ready for bed an hour ago. So I'm going now. Goodnight!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

infection city

The good news is that I do not have TMJ!!!

The bad (really bad) news is that I have an abscessed tooth. Major infection in there. While I am thrilled to have a correct diagnosis and drugs that will actually HELP, I am less than excited about getting a root canal down the road. But I guess it must be done.

If you have never had an infected tooth, don't get one! Haha. Not much you can do to stop it though. I thought the pain was unbearable before I went to the dentist. Then they took the xray. I have never hurt so bad in my life. It might have even been more painful than my whole wisdom teeth ordeal.

Well I just took some pain killers, the kind that will actually kill some pain, and now I am going to make a scrambled egg and hope I can choke it down. (I love eggs, it just hurts a lot to swallow.) Then I will take my antibiotic and go to sleep. Don't really care if I go to bed at 7, seeing as how I got maybe only 2 good hours of sleep last night.

Monday, May 17, 2010

oddly proud

I have 2 nice little purple toenails today. They make me feel accomplished. They are twins too, both on the second toe on each foot. It will be interesting to see if they fall off before the wedding I am in in July, or if they will still be there looking ugly. I wonder what the nail person will say... hahaha.

In other news, my ear might explode! No really. I have been in massive facial pain since Thursday night, so I went to the doctor on Friday and got diagnosed with TMJ. Which I knew nothing about until Friday. So most of the left side of my head is sore in some way or another, mostly in my jaw area, up through my ear. My ear has been popping all day, and feels so full. Hence explosion. I have a dentist appointment for Wednesday morning, and hopefully they can do something for this pain. I do not want to be waking up in the middle of the night having to put ice on half my face just so that I can go back to sleep. (No joke, that is what happened last night!) Do any of you have TMJ? If so, what in the world do you do to relieve it? My NSAIDs hardly do anything for me, so far ice is the only thing that has helped.

Well it is looking like it is going to rain soon, and I really need to get a run in today. I know how insanely crazy that sounds after running 13.1 miles yesterday. I don't know why I feel this need to get out, but I think if I do it, I might loosen up a little, and that would be grand. So I'm going to try to beat the rain... and if it doesn't rain, I might go out with Carter for a walk later, too!